Motherhood

I am thankful for motherhood.

I did not receive the mothering I needed. This is something I have had to realize in order to move forward. Cycles and generations of abuse stopped with me. I am far from a perfect or ideal mother. But as I learn more, I do the best I can.

I am not my kids best friend and I do not treat them as equals at this time in our relationship. I am their guide, their (almost) fearless leader, and I am their counselor. I am a teacher, a nurturer, and an advocate for them in all their pursuits and dreams. I respect them and treat them as individuals while teaching them the importance of morals, values, and community. I am a fierce mama bear, but even that has shifted as I train these young hands to fight themselves. I can not protect them from the evil in this world, but I will shield them as best as I can while they learn to pick up their swords and fight their own demons. We know the battle is fierce and we are front line fighters in the battle for justice, for joy, and for hope. We will not be shaken by what comes ahead because, if anything, I have taught these souls to lean into Jesus as the source of our salvation.